Confessions of a Baseball Mom: Looking Back

Looking back at our kid’s time in sports is eye opening. There is a nine -year difference between our older two, and our twin boys. When our older son was in sports, especially baseball, everything was so important. It was important which position he played. How many innings he played was important. Whether the team won or lost was important. If he made it on a club team or the varsity high school team was important. I hate to admit it, but at times we were consumed with our kid’s sports.

Years later when we were, again, sitting on the sidelines at our twin boy’s soccer games, it did not seem so important. What position they played, how much playing time they got, or what the score was at the end of the game just didn’t matter anymore. We would sit in the shade in our folding chairs and watch as the other parents stood and paced up and down the sidelines yelling at their five year old to kick the ball into the goal. We looked at each other and admitted how foolish we had been to act like that. At the end of their time with us, after they moved out of the house, it did not matter how many games they won or lost when they were five or fifteen. It is amazing how a few years and (dare I say it?) age, can change your perspective.

Our older two are married and have been out of our house a few years. We were given the privilege of a ‘do over.’ We made it through the toddler years twice. We went through the preschool and elementary school years twice. We are watching our boys play sports, and sitting on the sidelines, again. We are also in the home stretch of getting two, soon to be young adults, through middle school. It has not always been easy, but we have enjoyed every season. We love our boys and are thankful we get to continue parenting after our older kids left the nest.

Because we had a different perspective and the advantage of experience, we decided to do some things differently.

This time around we decided to:

Look for the good, instead of pointing out the things they needed to work on.

Instead of teaching them about God’s rules for life, we would teach them more about how much God loves them.

Instead of focusing on their report card grades, we would focus more are how much they are learning.

Instead of trying to have a spotless house, we (I) let them play in the mud, get dirty, take apart old appliances and have a million nuts, bolts and tools spread on their floor.

Instead of admiring animals from a distance, we let them catch and keep every kind of lizard, frog, tarantula and snake they wanted to. (The snakes have to stay outside though!)

Instead of striving so hard for the end result, we are enjoying our boys and the journey more. Four more years and our parenting will be done. They will always be our sons, but we won’t always have the influence we have with them now. Having experienced the high school years before, we know that time flies by. In the blink of an eye they will be finished and moved out. I will have plenty of time to have a clean house then.

It is fun to look back, but we are also enjoying the present season. How about you?

Coach Dad and our 14 year old soccer sons.

For more lessons we learned click here.

 

The Pickle Predicament

          Getting in a pickle in baseball happens when a runner gets stuck between two bases. The player made it to one base and tried to advance to the next base, but someone threw the ball to that base, before he could make it safely. So, the runner has to make the decision to try to run back to the previous base, but, since the other team can throw a ball faster than a player can run, now the ball is at the original base. There is nothing that the runner can do, but run back and forth, as the opposing team plays a game of Monkey in the Middle, over the runner’s head. All the while the opposing team is taking a step closer toward the runner, until finally, the opposing team is so close they can tag the runner out with the ball. Sometimes, usually in Little League, the opposing team will make a wild throw, or their teammate will fail to catch the ball and as the ball whizzes by the teammate, the runner can advance safely to one base or the other.

In life, we call this situation, being caught between a rock and a hard place. Both ways we could turn in a situation are dreadful options.

The Bible says when we are tempted God always provides a way out for us. We sometimes mistake that verse to say: ‘God does not give us more than we can handle.’ That is not true.

Life is hard. There are many things we cannot handle on our own. That is why we need God. If we never had more than we could handle, we would not need God.

On our own, we cannot handle our child dying, our spouse leaving us, or losing our house. We need God in those situations.

A pickle, however, is when we have a choice to make, and many of life’s choices are hard.

--To move an ailing parent into a nursing home, or care for them full time in your home?

--To turn your teen’s friend in to the authorities when you find out they have drugs, knowing your teen will be mad and won’t trust you again?

--To continue to be miserable in your marriage, or go to marriage counseling?

--To take a new job that offers more money, but requires more out of town travel?

--If we are a pet owner, do we pay $2000 for a pet surgery or have our beloved companion put out of their misery?

Life is full of difficult decisions. What should we do when we find ourselves in a pickle between two tough decisions?

1.     Pray. When life is too difficult God wants us to go to Him. The Bible says if we ask God for wisdom, He will give it to us.

     

2.     Ask yourself, which decision most lines up with God’s Word? That is our playbook for life. It has all the answers. The question of whether or not we should spend hours talking to an old flame on Facebook, may not directly be in the Bible, but the concept of being faithful to our spouse definitely is.

   

3.     Seek wise counsel.  Talk to people who have a strong and consistent walk with God. Ask someone who knows the Bible and can point you to Biblical truth.                                                

       

   Being in a pickle is never easy, not on the baseball field, or in life. Tough decisions are, well, tough to make.

Thankfully, when we find ourselves in a real pickle, we know who we can turn to.  Here’s to wishing you a successful run in your next pickle. You know the heavenly crowd will cheer loudly for you when you land on the base safely.

You Can't Steal Second, With Your Foot on First Base

           One of the most exciting plays in baseball is when a runner, who made it to first base, tries to steal second base. It is an out of the ordinary play, and not many runners are successful. While on first base, before the next batter hits the ball, the runner tries to sprint to second base before the pitcher or catcher throws the ball to the second baseman, who can then tag the runner out.

What does it take to steal second base?

1.     Guts. The runners that steal second are bold, gutsy, and have a ‘go for it’ attitude.

2.     Confidence. They need to be confident they can run faster than the catcher or pitcher can throw the ball to second base.

3.     Sliding. To steal, the runner has to sprint to second base and then dive head first, arms outstretched, to try and tag second base.

4.     Most importantly, and without this it is impossible to get to second, the runner must take his foot off first base. They have to take a few steps away from the base, get a lead off, and look for the best opportunity to run.

            There is a huge risk is doing this. Stepping off the base alerts the other team that you may try to steal second. At any time the pitcher can turn around and throw the ball to the first baseman, who can tag the runner out, if his foot is not touching first base. Taking a few steps off of first and towards second taunts the pitcher to throw to the first basemen, sending the message to the runner: You better not steal. You can’t make it and I am here to see that you don’t.

            Stealing second is so risky; there are usually many failed attempts, before a runner is successful. The catcher has a very strong arm, and if the pitcher does not throw the runner out, the catcher can usually blast the ball to second base before the runner can make it.

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            Isn’t this how it is in real life also? We will never make it to our goal, if we stay where we are. In a game, the next few hitters could strike out, and the game could end without you ever leaving the first base bag.

            For us to make it to our goal, or our next step, we have to start. We have to get off first base, our comfort zone, and take a few steps in the direction we want to go.

            We also need to have the bold, ‘go for it’ attitude. Nobody ever accomplished anything without having the guts to try something new.

            We need to be confident in the skills and talents our Heavenly Coach has instilled in us. We need to be confident that any path He puts us on, that He will be with us as we run toward the next base.

            Diving head first into second base can be painful. Along the path towards our goal, there may be pain and difficulties as well. When we dive head first toward our goal, arms outstretched, we can get a little bruised or scraped, and we end up dirtier than when we started. But, when we look back, accomplishing that goal will be worth all the difficulties.

            Taking our foot off first base, taking a few steps towards our goal, is the most important step. We need to be alert to the opportunities and struggles that may come our way. We need to be prepared that someone may try to prevent us from reaching our goal. We need to have a clear path to our goal, and we need to give it all we’ve got.

            When that happens, it is a beautiful thing to watch.

“I leave the past behind and with hands outstretched to whatever lies ahead I go straight for the goal—my reward the honor of being called by God in Christ.” Philippians 3:14

      Are you living in fear, with your foot firmly planted on first base?  Or are you living in faith, by taking a risk, and taking a few steps towards your goal? 

  Take a few more steps.  You can do it.

You can click (here) to read more like this.

Confessions of a Baseball Mom: Don't Miss the Signs

           It was not until my son was playing high school baseball and my husband was one of the coaches, that I realized the importance of the signs.  Looking back, the coaches had used signs in Little League to tell the catcher, who would signal to the pitcher, which pitch to throw.  Back then there were not a lot of different pitches and the signaling system always seemed to go fairly smoothly. There would only be a problem if the pitcher was not quite able to throw, say an accurate curve ball.  This was always due to lack of skill or execution, not because of a lack of willingness by the player.  Pitchers were trying their best to throw the ball the way the coach wanted.

            This changed, for the first time that I noticed, at the high school level.  We knew of a team in our city that was very good.  They had several returning seniors and one of their pitchers was exceptionally good.  He could throw his fastball faster than most.  The previous season, our team was only able to manage one hit when we faced him.

            During a game, this pitcher was shaking his head at the catcher, when the catcher relayed the coaches’ signs.  This is routinely done in the major leagues, but to my small baseball mind, this was unheard of in high school baseball.  The coach grew increasing upset at this pitcher after he did this several times.  Finally, to put an end to it, the coach walked out onto the field, pointed at the pitcher and yelled, “If you aren’t going to throw the pitches I call, you won’t be pitching for me anymore!”  It was a huge wake up call for the pitcher, as well as his teammates.

            Thankfully, our Heavenly Coach does not yell at us like that.  Although, I have needed plenty of wake up calls in my life in order to pay attention to my Coach.  How often do we shake off the signals from our Heavenly Coach?  Certainly our team has a history of doing this.  Look at Jonah.  The Coach was going to send him in to deliver a pitch to Nineveh, and Jonah shakes off the sign.  He does not get very far, because God wanted Jonah for that particular play.

            How many times have we said, “If God would only send me an obvious sign, like a burning bush,” or as my friend says, “even a sticky note on the door,” I would know what to do and I would do it.

Our Heavenly Coach is a creative communicator.  He has only sent the sign of a burning bush once.  In baseball, the coaches change up the signs so the other team does not steal them.  God uses plenty of different signs as well.

            Make no mistake about it, He is sending signs.  For one, He has given us His playbook, the Bible.  We would do well to read it, since most of our plays and signs are found there.  “Love your neighbor. Always be willing to give an answer for the hope that is within us. Give to the poor. Baptize and make disciples.”  The plays go on and on.

            Then, there is the Holy Spirit living within us.  We know when the Holy Spirit is nudging us to do something.  “Invite that person to church.   Call that person and pray with them.  Ask someone how they are doing, instead of talking about yourself.”  Let’s be honest, we know when we get a sign and we know who it is from.

            How many times have I, like that high school pitcher, shaken off my sign from God?  I know I have many times and am convicted not to miss the my sign the next time.

            I remember once when I shook off a burning bush type sign.  It was not a literal burning bush, but our modern day equivalent.  A friend, I had not heard from in a long time, called me out of the blue.  She said she had been praying for several months because she was in charge of selecting the speaker for their church’s women’s retreat.  She said the Lord kept giving her my name, so she was calling to ask if I would do it.

            Immediately my heart began to race.  I had never spoken at a women’s retreat before, although I had spoken in other venues and God had equipped me.  I told her I would pray about it and get back to her, because I knew that was what I was supposed to say.

            As soon as I hung up, my heart nearly pounded out of my chest.  My whole body began to heat up.  (If that was not a sign, I don’t know what was.)  I began to walk around my kitchen talking to the Lord.  I starting giving Him a long list of the reasons I was the wrong person for this play.  My list was very thorough.  I told Him of all my flaws, insecurities, inadequacies, my lack of anything meaningful to say, and my inexperience.

            My husband, the baseball coach, who usually does not miss his signs from the Lord, told me I should go for it.  I spent the next two days rehearsing to him all the reasons why I was the wrong person for this job. Finally, he grew weary of listening and told me to do what I thought was best.

            As quickly as I could, I called my friend and told her that she was mistaken in her sign from God.  The reason, I told her, that God had given her my name, was because I have a great friend who would be perfect for this assignment.  My friend on the phone was a little baffled, but since she had followed through on her part and called me, I would have to do whatever it was God wanted me to do.  I called my other very experienced retreat-speaking friend and she agreed to do it.  I was off the hook.

            It was not until a year later, during an intense time with the Lord, that I heard clearly, “That was for you.”  I cried for about three days.  I confessed my sin to Him and begged for His forgiveness.  But most of all, I was so sorry I had disappointed Him on a play He had called for me.  Also, I missed an opportunity for Him to use me in spite of all my inadequacies.

            I have heard that God will give us a make up play when we have blown it.  I am still shaking in my cleats thinking about that.  But, I know I do not ever want to shake off a sign from the Lord again.  I want to throw the pitches He calls for me.  I know I can do nothing without Him, and I can do everything He calls me to do because He will give me the strength to do it. Let me encourage you. We all miss the signs sometimes, but let’s stay in the game. The assignments He gives to us are uniquely created for us.What He calls us to, He will see us through.

            What about you? Have you ever missed a sign or gone against an assignment the Lord chose for you?

Confessions of a Baseball Mom -- Home Run Hitters

             Baseball is such a great sport!  I love everything about it, the pitching, the hitting, the teamwork of the defense, and the strategy of the game.  It has taken me 13 seasons of watching more games than I can count, and playing church softball, to really begin to understand all the intricacies of the game.   I have the added advantage of being married to a coach who loves to discuss every detail of every play for hours after a game.

            After all these years, I am finally starting to get it.  The most important lessons in life I have learned from my heavenly Coach.  Here is one of them.

              Not everyone is a home run hitter.  This has been a huge lesson for me.  Every player from tee ball to the big leagues wants to be a home run hitter.  They get the most cheers.  They bring in the most runs.  Their hits are the most impressive.  They seem to be the most important players on the team. Home runs are fun. They are exciting to watch.  They get the player, the team and the fans all fired up and sometimes give the team the momentum to win the game.

            Even though players are told from early on that Babe Ruth, the all time home run hitter, also had a huge amount of strike outs, that does not seem to matter.  They all still want to be like Babe Ruth and swing for the fence.

            It was not until my son’s last season in Little League that I finally understood that being a home run hitter was not everything.  There had been a game where my son hit a home run over a 40-foot fence and the crowd and his team went wild.  It helped propel our team to a big win.  There was another game when our team was losing by a significant amount and all hope of winning was already gone.  A player hit another home run over the fence in the last inning and it did not mean anything.  None of his teammates were on base.  It was not enough.  It did not excite the team or the crowd because we were already so far behind.  Everyone knew we could not win even with the home run.

            That is how it is in life too.  There are certainly home run hitters on the Lord’s team as well; Billy Graham, Kay Arthur, Max Lucado, and Beth Moore, to name just a few.  God has called them and equipped them to be home run hitters and they play their positions extremely well.  We all cheer them on when they hit a home run for eternity.  We, as teammates, can get excited after a home run, more energized to go out and do our part for the team.

            Most of us, however, are not home run hitters.  Sure, we occasionally hit a home run.  God equips us with the words and the opportunity and enables us, by the power of the Holy Spirit, to lead someone to the Lord.  The Bible says the angels cheer in their stands when that happens.  Our team gets excited and we all rejoice in the win.

            The words that I hear coaches call out for almost every batter is, “WE NEED A HIT!  JUST PUT THE BALL IN PLAY!”  “LINE DRIVE!  BASE HIT!”   Thankfully, our Heavenly Coach is not yelling at us, but it seems like that is what He wants from us also, a base hit.  Most of the time He wants me to simply put the ball in play.  Hit a line drive.  He calls out for me to invite people to church or to a Bible study.  That is the opening they need to find Jesus.  Most of the time we simply need to serve where God has called us.  We need to be a greeter, work in the youth department, volunteer at VBS, pray with someone, or start a home Bible study group.

            Our baseball game is different than a Little League game.  In our game, the score is already confirmed.  We know our team has already won.  Our Heavenly Coach’s son, made a tremendous sacrifice with his life, so that everyone on His team wins.

            Even though in the end, our team wins, our Heavenly Coach still has plays He wants us to run. It is the last inning. He still has pitches for us to throw and He wants us to hit a single to move someone closer to home.  He still calls out for us to make the play and do our part.  How is He calling out to you?  How are you hitting the ball for a base hit?  Don’t give up.  Our team needs each player to do their part.  If each player hits a single, we move each other around the bases, until in the end, all of our players are home.  The angels are cheering.  Our team is victorious.  You and I may not be home run hitters, but we can still swing for the fence when our name is called.