Meeting Birth Mother # 3

            (Welcome to Day 14 of Our Adoption Adventure.  If you would like to read from the beginning click here.) 

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         We knocked on the door and waited anxiously for someone to answer. An attractive young woman with a large smile and a large belly welcomed us in. She had beautiful brown skin and long, shiny black hair. Her brown eyes sparkled and the dimples on both of her cheeks made her look happy all the time. She seemed excited to meet us.

         She showed us into the neat living room and we sat on the couch with her. She was sweet and gracious and easy to talk to. I brought our family album to show her who we were. The book had been at the adoption agency for potential birth mothers to look through when deciding on a family to place their child with. She lit up at the pictures of our other two kids and our fun family vacations.

         Her name was Emma and she was 19 years old. She already had a one-year daughter from a previous boyfriend. She explained how he left once the daughter was born. The father of the twins she was carrying now wanted her to abort as soon as he found out she was pregnant. She said she could never do that. He would not help at all and quickly broke things off with her. She told us how her family promised to help with her daughter, and they did at first, but mostly it was Emma raising her by herself. She had to drop out of high school when she found out she was pregnant. It was a struggle for her financially even working the drive through at a fast food restaurant and living with her parents. 

         She knew right from the beginning of this pregnancy she could not raise another child by herself. She found a couple that wanted to adopt, when they thought it was one baby. They even made initial plans at a lawyer’s office. Then, last month when an ultrasound revealed she was carrying twins, the couple decided they could not do it. They said two babies were too much for them to handle and they pulled out of the adoption. Emma panicked and began asking around to friends and family. Almost everyone she knew had kids of their own to take care of, and could not afford more children. A few people offered to take one of the twins, but she never wanted to separate them. She asked us again, as her Aunt had, if we were positive we would take both of them. I assured her not only were we always planning on adopting two children, we had been praying for two children for over a year. She was thrilled that we WANTED twins. She beamed at the thought. Really, she was an answer to our prayers.

         Affectionately she wrapped her arms around her belly. She told us she loved these two babies growing inside her and she wanted the best life for them. She knew she could not give them a good life. She was barely getting by with her daughter.

         After an hour of chatting in her house we asked if we could take her out to lunch. Her grandma was watching her daughter, so she said she would love to go out to eat. She was happy to continue discussing details about placing for adoption. We asked how we could help her. She said adopting her twins was the most helpful thing we could do for her, humbly she added, food would be great too. After lunch we took her to a grocery store and bought a cart full of food for her. We discussed her health and her doctor’s visits. She had trouble finding a ride to the doctor’s office, so she only made it to a few appointments. My protective side reared up and despite the long drive, I committed right then to taking her to all of her doctor’s appointments. She was surprised and so grateful for the help.

         After carrying her bags into the house, we said our good-byes. She hugged us at the door.  I told her I would see her in two weeks to drive her to her doctor’s appointment. On our drive home my husband and I marveled at how pleasant and peaceful she was compared to the other birth mothers we had known. She was sweet and kind and a breath of fresh air.

“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all he has done.

Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”   Philippians 4:6,7

*** Click here for Day 15 and more of Our Adoption adventure. ***